What I Go To School For
by City Girl Dreamer
Summary: "Well, when two male lions have sex, it's because they're strengthening the bond between them. Stronger bond equals stronger pride. Didn't you know that?" No, Sora did not know that, nor had he ever wanted to know that. SoRiku. Yaoi. DISCONTINUED.
1. MATHS: Trial And Error

**GAH! I've freaking done it AGAIN! I have so many stories to update and yet VOILA...another story pops up to bite me in the ass.**

**Curse the plot penguins! ^_^ But HEY...50th STORY CELEBRATION!  
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_**Warning:** Fluff...**YAOI**...Riku and his many levels of Angst...Sora and his many levels of innocent/naivety...ummm...other stuff?  
_

_**Disclaimer:**_ _After extensive searching of each game box, I found no contract declaring I was the owner of Kingdom Hearts...yet..._

**Okay, so if you've read '**Fun With Numbers**' and '**Elementary, My Dear Roxy**', then consider this the SoRiku equivalent! By the way, in this chapter, each part in italics relates to the dialogue above it. Just to be clearer. ^_^  
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**Dedicated to 'The Celestial Dragon' for requesting this many, many years ago. One year ago to be exact! ^_^  
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**ENJOY!  
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MATH - Trial And Error

Definition: One way of approaching difficult numerical problems is to guess a solution, look at what is wrong with it, and use that information to make another guess... and so on.

_When life is full of ifs and buts, trial and error is the best way to go._

_

* * *

_

"Sora...?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"You just did."

"..."

"...sorry."

"Oh, don't be sorry. I'm just curious as to why you're kissing my eyebrow."

* * *

_They were sat outside during lunch, resting under the shade of a tree and away from prying eyes and annoying questions. The King had advised them to avoid all and any inquisitions as possible. The advice was to aid them in making their lives easier, making their experience and their memories easier to forget. Riku didn't want to remember the darkness, Kairi didn't want to remember being kidnapped...twice._

_And Sora...?_

_Well, Sora knew it wouldn't be polite if he told the King where he could put that advice. Also it would be entirely out of character and so not him. However, Sora had been through a helluva lot and had decently tolerated even more. Having the Keyblade plus the added Responsibility of having said Keyblade, forced upon him? Yeah, he could handle that. Sacrificing his own heart to save Kairi? He handled that. Watching as Riku closed that freaking door and then having to find him _all over again_? Yeah, he handled that pretty well._

_Having to forget everything and cutting all ties with everyone he met, including Leon and the others? _Especially _when he had already lost his memories once, some memories were still fuzzy and other memories were too painful to forget? _THAT _right there, that was pushing it! Sora didn't want to forget anything or anyone, so in his own subtle-but-clearly-not-subtle-at-all way, Sora would answer a few questions, but would rebuff the ones that involved Riku or Kairi._

_Unfortunately, due to his 'generous' answering, other people expected Riku and Kairi to answer their questions too. Therein, Riku had dragged Sora away from annoying, nosy crowds and flipped his hair at them. Riku's special equivalent to a politely put 'fuck you'._

_Once Riku had pulled Sora away, he had forced the brunet to hide by the tree. Sora didn't argue, mostly due to the fact that Riku had flipped his hair. When Riku flipped his hair, you do not argue. Like, at all. __However, I digress.__ They enjoyed the peaceful silence together, Riku perched on a low branch of the tree and Sora sitting on the ground leaning against the rough bark. Riku had his eyes closed, whilst Sora had his eyes trained on the boy resting above him._

_A few rays of the sun had managed to slice through the leaves in the tree, casting a beautiful glow over the reclining boy. Now Sora always had a soft spot for pretty things. Well, shiny things to be more specific. Of course, that didn't mean he was shallow. Of course. Sora was way too nice to even contemplate being shallow. However, right now in this moment in time, Riku had never before looked so pretty. Which was a bad thing to think. Because Riku was his friend and Riku would certainly do more than a hair flip if he caught Sora calling him pretty._

_Furrowing his eyebrows, Sora quietly stood up, keeping his eyes trained on Riku. Luckily for him, Riku hadn't even twitched. The brunet slowly crept up on tip-toe and inched his way towards the silver-haired boy. At this angle, Riku looked very much like a girl. Gah! Another thing he shouldn't be thinking! That one wouldn't even gain him a hair flip, Riku would skip right over that part to the killing bit! But still...Riku's hair was very shiny and soft looking. Kairi's hair was like that too, only Riku's was longer and fell into his eyes as a way to hide them. Which was a shame, because Riku had ever such pret-handsome! Handsome eyes. Manly eyes. Very, very guy-like eyes. With long eyelashes. And this very prett-manly, handsome aquamarine colour! So masculine. Oh-so-masculine._

_Riku was a guy. Ergo, not pretty. He was masculine like...Leon-masculine and Cloud-masculine and those were the _worst examples_ in the world! Sora sighed and tilted his head to the side. Okay, so guys could be pretty and effeminate, but they were still guys. Because he was sure that Leon, Cloud and Riku would all mutilate and murder him if they ever heard him utter the word pretty in relation to their looks._

_Glancing up at Riku, Sora felt this sudden urge hit him. Blue eyes trained on Riku's features widened as he took in the thin, pink lips. He wanted to kiss those lips. Which was weird, but also not weird at all, because when they were younger, he and Riku would always kiss as a way of saying 'hello' and 'goodbye'. But then Kairi arrived and suddenly Sora didn't want to kiss Riku anymore, he wanted to kiss her._

_...oh. That must have been like a kick in the gut for Riku. Huh, no wonder he kept pushing at Sora to confess his crush on Kairi. Which no longer was a crush, really. Sure Sora liked Kairi, but after all that had happened they had realised that they didn't want to ruin everything, nor did they want the __cliché relationship between a princess and her prince. No, they decided to wait just a little while longer until both felt ready. Right now though, Kairi couldn't be further from his mind._

_Right now Sora wanted Riku. To kiss Riku. Unfortunately, as Sora went up to kiss Riku, the silver-haired boy chose that moment to shift down.  
_

_

* * *

_

"I'm not kissing your eyebrow."

"Oh? My bad then. Let me rephrase that: why are your lips connected to the part of my body that's directly above my eyes?"

"Ummm...I was...trying to...smell your hair?"

"Nice save. Usually when I try to smell things, I use my nose. Not my lips."

"Whatever."

"Channeling Leon there, are we?"

"..."

"C'mon Sora, just tell me why you're-"

"I'm not!"

"..."

"..."

"...your lips are still thereee~"

* * *

_Sora had frozen, his entire body flooding with ice cold humiliation. How was he to face Riku and his inevitable questions now? Better question yet, how the hell did he miss Riku's lips? The last time he checked, lips were at one side of the spectrum, eyebrows so far down the other side. Major epic fail on his part there._

_What was worse was Riku's inability to believe his excuse.__ Riku's hair did smell awfully nice and in his opinion that was a helluva good excuse to use. Then Riku brought up Leon which was totally unfair because Sora missed him along with everyone else, then Riku took advantage of his minor stalled moment of nostalgia by reverting back to their original topic of conversation. Not cool.  
_

_Sora tried hard to ignore Riku's mocking, sing-song voice. He reluctantly pulled away_,_ mostly due to the awfully lovely smelling hair. Averting his eyes, Sora bit his lip, feeling his face heat up under Riku's scrutiny. Intense aquamarine orbs burned into his skull and he started to fidget. Riku began calling his name, his voice growing more concerned with each time he uttered it. The brunet however refused to answer, his embarrassment too much for him to face._

_A pair of fingers grasped his chin and forced him to face the silver-haired boy. His breath froze in his throat as he came face-to-face with intense, piercing eyes that petrified him to the spot.  
_

_

* * *

_

"Sora? Are you ignoring me?"

"Nope. Just in denial over your general existence."

"Wow. That was mean. Especially considering how long and hard you looked to make sure that my existence was in fact existing."

"...that made no sense."

"Neither does your behaviour. Tell me, what were you trying to do?"

"No. You'll hate me."

"How could I possibly hate you. After all we've been through. After what you've done for me. Sora, I'm surprised that you don't hate me for everything I did to Kairi and you."

"We can't hate you Riku. You're Riku...everybody who meets you will find it impossible to hate you. Even if you are rude and indifferent to them."

"Hmmm. So, you gonna tell me or what?"

"No. You'll hair flip on me."

* * *

_Pouting at being caught (not that he was doing a very good job with hiding it), Sora sighed and flicked his eyes down to the floor. He resigned himself to the fact that there was no other way of getting out of this and gave Riku a dramatic retort that earned himself a harsh smack in the gut. Not literally, of course. Sora hated it when Riku went into 'Angst Mode: Level 5'. The fifth level indicating that Riku was only implying the angst, which gave Sora the impression that Riku would still curl up into a ball in a corner, moping about how unfair and dark his life was._

_The angst only got worse with each higher level. Lucky for Sora, he had never actually witnessed 'Angst Mode: Level 1'._

_Of course, Riku then climbed up the angst ladder. This was probably Sora's fault for saying that Riku would hate him, therefore Riku's angst level reached Level 4 - indicating that everyone and anyone should HATE him because he's RIKU and he's DARK and BLAH, BLAH, BLAH! Naturally, this self-pity level wound up Sora the most. What he said had been true. No one hated Riku, not even those who were close to the Seven Princesses Of Heart. They had forgiven him ages ago and yet Riku couldn't forgive himself. _

_When Sora took Riku to visit his pseudo family in Radiant Garden, they instantly adored him as much as they loved Sora. Even Cloud took a shine to Riku which was really something because it was sorta hard to see if Cloud took a shine to anyone in particular.  
_

_Obviously Riku made that sound, you know, that didn't indicate any possibility of agreeing or disagreeing with what as just been said and whatnot. Then when Sora saw that Riku didn't understand the severity of the situation and the seriousness of it all, he pulled out the big guns._

_The Hair Flip._

_Therein, Riku's eyes lit up in understanding and he nodded knowingly.  
_

* * *

"Sora. Were you trying to kiss me? Like on the lips?"

"...sorry."

"What are you sorry for? We always used to kiss before."

"Yeah, when we were like three or something. And that was before Kairi came too."

"...oh."

"Yeah 'oh'."

"Ah...of course. My bad."

"And anyway, when we kissed, it was all innocent and sweet. Now, it's just...I want...it's...different."

"Ooooh. Heh, so Sora is the same as every other hormonal teenage boy in this universe."

"Shut up."

"Aw, you're pouting. Hey, no reason to get all embarrassed. Lotsa people fantasize about me."

"You're so stuck up!"

* * *

_Of course, he was nodding due to the fact that he had caught onto what Sora had been trying to do_. _Flushing and horribly embarrassed by being found out, Sora gave him a pitiful apology and a doleful look. Riku shook his head, laughing slightly. The laugh that said 'oh-Sora-you-are-an-idiot'. Sora didn't much appreciate that laugh._

_Being reminded of how they used to kiss made Sora wrinkle his nose. When they were little, the first thing that came to his mind whenever he saw Riku was 'oh lookie, there's Wiku...KISS!'. Now he was twelve years older, able to pronounce his Rs and he was able to distinguish the difference between the word 'Riku' and the word 'Kiss', that thought hadn't entered his mind at all._

_Rather, his train of thought ran along the tracks of 'oh lookie, Riku's kinda pretty...KISS!'. _

_However, he couldn't just say _that _to the silver-haired boy. It would be, like, the epitome of humiliation. Embarrassment squared. Mortification cubed. His weak explanation didn't aide him in his dilemma and neither did Riku's arrogance._

_Oh yes, 'lotsa people fantasize about Riku'...rub it in why don'cha? Sora huffed and growled, not happy that other people wanted to kiss Riku, even though he was there first AND he had shared first kisses with Riku. So. Yeah._

_Who could possibly beat that?  
_

* * *

"C'mon Sora, try again. This time aim for my lips."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously."

"Ah...okay!"

"Hey, wa-argh! Too much enthusiasm on your part there Sora!"

"Sorry! Didn't mean to hit your nose!"

"It's okay, just try again."

* * *

_It was a serious case of major epic fail on his part. It was like Trial and Error from Maths class gone terribly wrong. Oh, if Ms. Jones could see him now...actually, maybe it was a good job she couldn't see him now. This was probably not how she envisioned him revising for next Tuesday's exam._

_I digress...again. Sora had taken Riku's permission to kiss him way too excitedly and had risen his head with delight glittering in his eyes. Unfortunately for Riku's nose, Sora leaned in a little too quickly and bumped noses with Riku. Then, calming himself down he leant up a kissed Riku...on his chin. Riku shook his head and rose an eyebrow. Sora huffed and tried again._

_This time he got Riku's nose again. Then his forehead. Then his cheek. His right eye._

_The silver-haired boy finally called it quits when Sora miraculously missed his lips and got his left ear instead.  
_

* * *

"Okay. Either your accuracy concerning aiming sucks, or you're deliberately avoiding my lips."

"Sorry. It's just...I don't wanna screw up!"

"How can you screw up a kiss?"

"Very. Easily. So!"

"Okay, okay...let me rephrase: how can you screw up a kiss with someone you trust?"

"...but what if I'm bad?"

"Then I'll teach you."

"What if you're bad?"

"..."

"..."

"..."

"Don't hair flip! I'm sorry! I didn't mean it like that! Riku? Riku! Stop hair flipping!"

* * *

**The Hair Flip. 'tis a dangerous thing...ye be warned!**

**^_^ ANYWAYS! I think I'll be having fun writing this whilst working on other stories! ^_^**

**Once more...50TH STORY CELEBRATION! ^_^  
**

**Perty please review!**

**Love City Girl**

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**


	2. ART: Impressionism

**Mwah, Mwah! Reviewers, how I adore you so. May you continue to be showered in glittery love.**

**Also, I have a new addiction. **Monochrome Factor**...it's like Kingdom Hearts meets Death Note meets Bleach meets every other anime out there. It's good but it could use more shonen-ai. Yes.  
**

**NOW! This one is completely separate to the last one. It's AU and everything! **FwN** and **EmDR** was supposed to be like this, but then I connected the drabbles together. This is different though. It's the same but different. Yeah.**

**ANYWAY! I was inspired by watching an advert at the cinema for **Scott Pilgrim vs. The World**. It had Micheal Cera in, so it gets my instant LOVE!**

**Ahem..anyway, this contains:** GODS of epic proportions. Knife-happy Larxene. Ummm...Axel praising the many wonders of Roxas. Sora? ^_^

**ENJOY!**

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ART - Impressionism

Definition: A theory or style of painting originating and developed in France during the 1870s, characterized by concentration on the immediate visual impression produced by a scene and by the use of unmixed primary colors and small strokes to simulate actual reflected light.

_Promiscuous Impressionists find it difficult to understand monogamy...they do everyone._

_

* * *

_

"Ummm...Riku?"

"Yeah?"

"Would you...I mean...would you, like, wanna gooutwithme...or something?"

"...I'm sorry, I didn't get that last bit."

"Will. You. Go. Out. With...me?"

"Sure, why not?"

"_Really_?"

"Uh huh, of course—"

"Great!"

"—you have to get the approval—"

"From your parents, I know."

"—from my five ex-boyfriends."

"..."

"..."

"Wait. What?"

* * *

_Sora has been friends with Riku for a long time. Like, a very long time. So why the hell hasn't he heard of these 'five ex-boyfriends'? For all the years they've been friends, Riku had never mentioned any romantic interest in anyone, let alone actually having a romantic relationship. Geez, not only that, but five romantic relationships? Five of them?_

_Why hadn't Riku told him? Sora could have been there to help him on all the first dates and he could have gotten all the juicy gossip on everything Riku did with his boyfriends and he could have been there to offer his shoulder for crying upon whenever Riku broke up with his boyfriends. None of which occurred, but really, he shouldn't be surprised. This was Riku they were talking about. Riku didn't ask for help. Riku didn't gossip. Riku didn't share secrets. Riku most certainly didn't cry!_

_Although, he guessed it was probably best that Riku didn't tell him about his secret love lives (PLURAL: FIVE LOVE LIVES). Sora would only have felt hurt and jealous if Riku told him all about his boyfriends. Then he would have felt the harsh, unnecessary feeling of hope whenever Riku broke up with one of his boyfriends. You see, Sora had been in love with Riku for a fair amount of time and knowing that Riku had had five boyfriends...well, that was quite the proverbial kick in the gut._

_Now, after all these years, Sora finally knew the truth. Which sucked in all honesty. Not only does he have to live up to the five ex-boyfriend's standards, but he has to meet them and gain their approval. Before the whole family affair? Suckage beyond belief, thank you very much. Riku had stated that first impressions were everything. Everything, even if he was making an impression upon five past lovers that really should stay in the past._

_Not pop up to say hello and decide whether Sora is worthy to join their ranks of potential Riku-lovers._

_Naturally, Riku thought Sora to be idiotically ridiculous when he came to hear about the brunet's inner feelings. Riku didn't want Sora to meet their 'standards'. Riku didn't want Sora to become like them, because as he had said before, there was a reason for why they were ex-boyfriends. Although, he did understand where Sora was coming from...having to make a good enough impression to gain full approval to date Riku by five ex-boyfriends did sound rather bad._

_However, it was an almost tradition for his new boyfriend to meet his old boyfriends. Despite the fact that each relationship ended rather quickly, his ex-boyfriends had remained as very good friends. So good, they were almost insanely protective of him and demanded than any new potential boy toys in the future had to be approved by them. Riku considered it fair, especially when taking into account of his poor track record concerning relationships. Riku was deep-rooted and deep-in-the-closet romantic. He wanted a perfect relationship and in order to gain that, he had to learn from his mistakes._

_Who better to help him than the people he made the mistakes with?  
_

_

* * *

_

"It'll be fine!"

"Five. Ex. Boyfriends? Who has five ex-boyfriends?"

"Sora, you're freaking out..."

"Of course I'm freaking out! You expect me to gain the approval of EX-BOYFRIENDS! Five of them!"

"It won't be that bad! They're actually sorta nice in their own unique ways. All you have to do is meet them and then act as if they're, like, my family. Which, in all actuality, they kinda are."

"Perfect. You know, it was bad enough trying to get your dad's approval for being your freaking _friend_, now I have to do it five times over just to be your _boy_friend!"

"...six times over actually. You do have to gain the approval of my actual dad again. Although, if you include my four brothers, you might want to make that ten times over."

"I can't win!"

"It'll be easy. Look, Ex-Boyfriends One and Two practically come hand-in-hand...mainly because they _will _be coming hand-in-hand, but whatever. You can meet them on Saturday!"

"Easy, huh? Why the hell do I have to meet your ex-boyfriends and why do I have to earn their approval?"

"...Sora, there is a reason for why they're my _ex_-boyfriends. They're just trying to protect me."

"Right. Okay."

"So...the first two you'll meet are Leon and Cloud."

* * *

_Apparently Leon was Riku's first boyfriend, first kiss and first time between the sheets. Riku was the one to break off that relationship, mainly because some guy named Seifer kept threatening him to back off what was 'his' and Riku couldn't handle seeing the amount of death threats that had been posted through the letter box. So many trees dying unnecessarily. Leon didn't mind the break-up, knowing that Riku only wanted sex, which was fine...he was using Riku too. Seifer had been pursuing him for years and he had hoped that getting himself a boyfriend would get the message across to him. Unfortunately Seifer didn't seem to understand that message._

_Boyfriend Number Two was Cloud. As soon as Riku introduced Cloud to Leon, he knew that he was five seconds away from being dumped. As soon as Cloud saw Leon, his eyes had lit up with desire and a need to protect and possess. Riku knew that Cloud could give Leon what he himself couldn't and he found that getting dumped didn't really hurt. He was genuinely happy for them both. Cloud had laid his claim on Leon immediately, giving Seifer a one-way trip to the hospital the first time they met. Leon found himself a gorgeous, committed boyfriend to keep away any unneeded stalkers and Cloud found himself a pretty little boyfriend that he could protect and talk to._

_Both relationships were utter fails in Riku's eyes. The first one was based upon using each other. Leon used Riku to help keep Seifer away, which failed. Riku used Leon so he could lose his virginity in more ways than one. The second one started out of boredom. Then it ended partly due to boredom...mostly due to Cloud's intense need to get inside Leon's pants._

_With this information in hand, Sora knew that he was royally fucked. Obviously Boyfriend Number One didn't want Sora to be dating Riku because he wanted to use him, ditto with Cloud except he didn't want the relationship to happen due to boredom. Hypocrites. Both of them. So when Sora met them on that dreaded Saturday afternoon, he envisioned himself having a truly hard time calling them out on how they treated Riku._

_Instead, he ended up swallowing every little insult as soon as they entered Riku's living room. Briefly wondering if 'beautiful' was Riku's type of guy, Sora squeaked out a couple of greetings. Leon and Cloud had walked into the room as if they OWNED it, with a swagger and a smirk that they OWNED and freaking hell, they were practically GODS. The brunet eeped once more before melting into a puddle of unworthiness as the two GODS eyed him with bemusement._

_Sora knew that for the next two hours, he was dead. Though, to be fair, his death would probably be due to boredom, therein proving all scientific theories regarding such a death as null and void. You can die of boredom and Sora was mere moments from wholeheartedly kicking the bucket. The GODS had to have special let's-turn-into-statues powers, as no one could be that still and that silent without actually being a statue. Or dead._

_The brunet briefly wondered if they had died of boredom as well and felt slightly miffed at the prospect of being considered boring. Sora hummed and shifted slightly, instantly gaining the attention of the three other males in the room. He melted a little under their heated stares and began to sob internally. No one had said anything yet and already Sora was itching to bring out the white flag. He had originally envisioned a deadly inquisition, complete with whips and spiky objects. What he hadn't expected was a competition as to who could be the most silent! The GODS were sat on the sofa, their hands entwined lazily, Riku was leaning against a wall and Sora was sat on an armchair between them._

_The silence was suffocating, the tension was thick and Sora was dying. What was with all the quiet? Were they both mute or something? Sora gasped (silently though, as to not disturb the peace) and his eyes widened. Maybe they were all infected with some kinda mute-inflicting-voice-box-breaking disease! But...could GODS get diseases? Oh...what if it was contagious?_

_Sora didn't want to live out the rest of his life in silence. He adored the beautiful sound of his own voice! The brunet gave Riku a fleeting look from under his fringe, wondering is this is what Riku expected. However, one glance at the silver-haired boy told yes, this is exactly what Riku expected. And more. Sora sighed (once again...silently) and he peered over to the GODS who were sat on the sofa. The brunet- Leon -was leaning against the sofa with his eyes closed, but he had a frowny face on and Sora felt the urge to point out that the brunet GOD would get wrinkles that way. But Leon was a GOD and therefore, was immune to wrinkles. The other GOD- Cloud -was sat straight up, glaring holes with his bright blue eyes. They were glowing. That was not normal. Another reason for why he was a GOD.  
_

_The word awkward couldn't even begin to describe how Sora felt as he observed the two. The only signs of life either of them gave was their joined hands, where Cloud kept rubbing his thumb over Leon's wrist. Sora tilted his head slightly at this small show of humanity and wondered if these GODS were merely humans...with GOD-like appearances. Then he remembered that their ability to keep that silent was not human at all and once again he resisted the urge to bow before them declaring his unworthiness._

_However, no matter how GOD-like they were, the silence was really starting to piss him off. He had been insanely nervous over meeting these two, especially considering that they were the first of five ex-boyfriends that he had to impress. Sora had wrecked his brain trying to come up with awesome and incredible solutions in order to gain instantaneous approval. Too bad they melted away with him when the GODS swaggered into the room._

_Sora huffed. Well, his solutions might have melted away, but his impatience still lingered. How was he supposed to gain their approval, if nothing happened?_

_Eh? EH?_

_The silence was building up and Sora began to feel like ticking cherry-bomb. Tick. Tick. Tick. The three other males were oblivious to Sora's internal agony and therefore, continued to ignore him. Sora didn't like being ignored. Tick. Sora hated silence. Tick. Sora really, really didn't like the idea of having to impress a couple of GODS so he could date Riku. Tick. God, he hoped the next three weren't GODS as well. Tick._

_He glanced at Riku. _

_'...'_

_Tick._

_He glanced at Leon. _

_'...'_

_Tick._

_He glanced at Cloud._

_'...'_

_ Tick._

_'...'_

_Boom._

_'AHHHHH! I can't take it anymore! Say something, don't just sit there and ignore me! SPEAK!'_

_Surprisingly, his outburst didn't shock the other three males in the room. Actually, they all gazed at him as if they expected him to explode. Riku however, was slightly awed that Sora had lasted that long. The GODS glanced at each other and then peered at Sora. The brunet melted a little from under their intense, GOD-like stares. The brunet GOD sighed and leaned forward, smiling softly at Sora. He seemed to be the more sympathetic GOD. Sora liked him._

_'Do you intend to use Riku for your own selfish benefits?'_

_Sora blinked and shook his head. The blond GOD squeezed the brunet GOD'S hand slightly and peered at Sora with bright (glowingglowingglowing...dammit, they were glowing) blue eyes. Sora melted a bit more from how tense the room had suddenly gotten. The brunet GOD hummed in amusement and Riku was torn between sighing in despair and bursting out in hysterical laughter._

_'You're not going out with Riku because you're bored are you?'_

_Sora shook his head again. He blinked and gazed over at Riku, wondering if the GODS were going to smite him next or something. For some reason, Sora was expecting some life-threatening trial in order to prove his worthiness towards Riku. What he wasn't expecting was this:_

_'Alright. We approve.'_

_The brunet blinked, gaping at how FREAKING SIMPLE that was! Riku could have just told him how simple that was, but noooo, Riku wanted to see him writhe and whimper and not in the totally sexy way either! The bastard. Clenching his fists and glaring hard at the silver-haired boy, Sora turned his attentions to the GODS next to him. Oh...they were so gonna get a piece of his mind. Never mind that they were drop-dead-gorgeous GODS! Hypocritical GODS too! The brunet aimed his most hateful glare at them, remembering that he was supposed to be chewing them out for how they treated Riku. He glared. They glared back._

_Sora melted. He was just so not worthy.  
_

_

* * *

_

"Then there's Axel."

"...wait. Axel? As in Axel, Axel? My brother's boyfriend Axel?"

"Is there any other Axel?"

"God I hope not...but still, you went out with him?"

"Well, we were both kinda rebounding with each other. Me from Cloud, him from...whoever he was dating and yeah, we got together. Leon and Cloud hated him so much, it was so funny."

"Why, what did he do?"

"I suggested that we would have a BBQ as a way to introduce Axel into my 'collection' as Leon sweetly puts it and Axel ended up burning my patio down to the ground."

"...why am I not surprised?"

"Anyway, Axel will be easiest to impress!"

"What makes you say that?"

"He's dating Roxas, isn't he?"

* * *

_Sora liked Axel and found it impossible to envision Roxas dating anyone other than the pyromaniac. Riku had told Sora that it was Axel who broke up with him due to a certain blond. A blond who wasn't actually Roxas, but Demyx from music class. Even then, their relationship lasted a month before Axel fell upon (quite literally too) Roxas. The skater punk had taken one look at the red-head before writing 'Property Of Roxas' on Axel's arm. _

_Axel had it tattooed later that afternoon. Axel and Roxas' relationship resembled a shotgun wedding. Except neither were drunk and both knew each other's names. What was similar was how they had met for, like, a minute before declaring each other as Soul Mates (or in their own words: Fucking. Soul. MATES! Got it memorized?). They didn't seem to find it disturbing in the least and would comment that Romeo and Juliet only knew each other for a day before they got married._

_Riku had then told them that Romeo and Juliet also committed suicide the day after their wedding. Axel presented him with a one-fingered salute whilst thrusting his tongue down Roxas' throat._

_Thinking that he had an advantage due to being the brother of Axel's precious 'Juliet', Sora found himself not as nervous as he was, when faced with Leon and Cloud. Oh...how foolish he had been. When Axel sauntered into Riku's living room (not exactly up to the same standards as Leon and Cloud. They were GODS! Axel was...Axel was like a DEMI-GOD, but with more DEMI and less GOD, but nevertheless, his saunter was rather admirable), Sora knew that he had been a foolish boy. Axel had seemed to forgotten all about his seemingly obvious relations with his brother._

_The red-head had a mask of ice on, no warmth lingering whatsoever, and he pinned Sora to the sofa using nothing but his eyes. His eyes! The brunet whimpered, knowing that the following events would rival the Spanish Inquisition and that historians would look back on this moment in time and forget all about the Spanish Inquisition and will shudder in fear as they all remember the Axel Inquisition._

_And damn...what an inquisition it was. Riku was lingering by the kitchen doorway all amused by Axel's act, chuckling away every time Sora would yelp and flinch in fear. The questions came hard and fast, unrelenting and merciless. Sometimes Axel wouldn't even let Sora finish his answer and would swiftly move onto his next question. Was Sora rebounding? Was Sora using Riku? Did Sora loooooove Riku? Well? Well? WELL?_

_The brunet was so close to committing suicide as he melted against Riku's sofa, desperately asking it to eat him up in his mind. This was totally different to the GODS trial of worthiness! THIS right here was what he had expected all along and yet it was Axel who was serving it out to him. Axel, the guy his brother adored and owned. AXEL, the guy who was impossible to like and yet you couldn't dislike him either. Sora had envisioned the typical 'you hurt him, I'll hurt you' scenario, but no. Axel's voice was cold and hard, his eyes narrowed and piercing. Sora couldn't even scratch his nose without Axel barking at him to keep still and answer his 'goddamn, fucking questions'._

_So, Sora was desperate. When Sora was desperate, Sora tended to say things without really thinking them through._

_'ROXAS!'_

_Axel had paused in mid-inquisition rant and cocked his head slightly. The red-head blinked a couple of times before his eyes lit up and a beautiful smile stretched across his face. Riku stifled his laughter by retreating to the kitchen, eyes filled with mirth. Sora licked his lips nervously and yelped with surprise as Axel threw himself onto the sofa next to Sora, proceeding to sing the many praises of one Roxas Rivera. The brunet's eyes widened as Axel began, in great detail, to describe the virtues of Roxas - including the many sins, some of which that made Sora slightly ill to envision._

_As Axel's declarations of his super hot, perfect, feisty, biting, hair-pulling darling took on a whole new direction of smut, Sora began to pray for the inquisition to return. Anything was better than listening to his brother's boyfriend explaining how Roxas was in bed. Even if it meant being chewed out by red-haired psycho-maniac._

_All in all though, Sora declared himself as fully approved by Boyfriend Number Three!  
_

* * *

"Then we have Marluxia. I dated him for a dare."

"A dare?"

"Oh yes. Axel originally dared me to ask out a girl, but I hadn't really taken technical issues into the equation."

"...what?"

"I thought Marluxia was a girl until he said 'yeah, why not'."

"Pffft! You thought Marluxia was a girl?"

"This coming from a guy who thought that Larxene was a badly dressed transvestite."

"Oh. Wow, I remember that...I still have the scars you know!"

"Yeah. Funny thing is...they're sorta dating each other now."

"...wow."

"I know."

* * *

_Riku definitely liked 'beautiful boys'. Each of his last three boyfriends were genuinely attractive in their own right. Marluxia was truly a pretty, pretty kind of guy. Until he talked that was. The pink-haired guy had a deep, enchanting voice that held an edge of danger whenever he spoke. Marluxia used his pretty, pretty looks to manipulate anyone within a five meter radius...as long as he didn't speak that is. One word out of his mouth and those within the five meter radius would quite literally freeze in terror._

_Sora didn't want to freeze to death today. He rather appreciated living and would very much like to continue doing so. Especially as he had already survived three ex-boyfriends. If he were to fail now then he might as well order that FAIL with a side dish of EPIC! The brunet was lounging on the grass waiting for Marluxia to arrive, an arm thrown across his face to protect it from the suns rays. Little did he know that his arm was just about to protect him from a flying knife of terror._

_'YEEOOOWWWWWWCHHHH!'_

_The brunet wailed and shook his arm desperately, seeing a sharp knife stuck in the forearm. The last time this had happened was when Great Auntie Ninja Yuffie came to visit...only she had used forks. He still had the scars you know. They're directly below the ones Larxene had given him when he had mistaken her for Badly Dressed Transvestite. Funny...Larxene used the same exact set of knives as the one currently embedded in his forearm and-_

_Oh._

_Fuck._

_Before he even had the chance to blink, Sora found himself pinned against a tree with a seething, wicked blonde witch looming over him. Suffice to say, Sora was pretty much praying for his life. As stated before, he rather liked it. The brunet whimpered as Larxene leaned in, her eyes gleaming dangerously, her teeth sharp and pointed. A hand slammed against the tree, inches away from Sora's head making him jump and swallow audibly. He yelped as she snatched the knife out of his arm and threw it behind her, as if it were nothing more than a piece of rubbish.  
_

_'Oh, I'm not making you nervous, am I?'_

_Silky, dangerous words. Dangerous question too. DENY! DENY! DENY!_

_'N-No! Of course not!'_

_A cruel smile grew on her face. In short, he was screwed. RETREAT! RETREAT! RETREAT! Larxene's smile curled up and she cocked her head to the side slightly, revealing a blank-faced Marluxia and a slightly-despairing-slightly-amused Riku. Sora's eyes widened, trying to convey his words of panic and mercy to the two other males in the garden. Their mental, telepathic link must be weak or something because they certainty didn't do anything to help him._

_Then...Larxene's question came: 'What are your intentions with precious Ri-kuuu?'_

_Sora blinked. Who the hell did she think he was? Some kinda perverted, molesting freak? And what the hell was with the 'precious Ri-kuuu' stuff? She doesn't even like him - ah, maybe she was here on behalf of Marluxia. If it had been Marluxia asking the questions, then Sora would have frozen a long time ago; ergo, rendering the whole 'trying to appease the ex-boyfriend' scenario as a bust. An Epic Fail of a bust. Still, wasn't it kinda cowardly to get your girlfriend to carry out the job for you? Shouldn't he be getting Marluxia's approval, not Larxene's? Was this fair?  
_

_Unfortunately, Sora had failed to notice that he hadn't actually answered Larxene's question yet, leaving the girl to fume in silence. Pulling another knife out of her, ah...from upon her body, Larxene's eyes took on a deadly glint. Sora only noticed the gleam of the knife at the last minute, therefore his dodge was not as quick as he had hoped and he watched with a broken heart as a few pieces of hair fluttered to the ground._

_'Ignore me? Give ME the silent treatment will ya? Die.'_

_Sora's eyes widened as he dodged another flying knife of doom, quickly hiding behind Marluxia. Feeling the older man shake, Sora realised with dismay that he was laughing at him. Laughing. At him. The nerve! How dare he laugh at Sora? Marluxia, who would quite happily stand there and let his girlfriend do all the work! The brunet was well and truly pissed at the the older man, briefly wondering why the hell he had to try and gain this guy's approval. Sora growled and heroically stood from behind Marluxia to Riku's side, hands on hips and face schooled into the 'I-am-not-happy-and-you-will-HEAR-about-it' expression. Larxene blinked and smirked as Marluxia flipped his hair (pah! He was an amateur hair-flipper compared to Riku) and regarded him with bemusement._

_'I have suffered through THREE ex-boyfriends already and I refuse to be skewered by a badly dressed transvestite who has nothing to do with the situation on my fourth, mainly because she is not an EX-BOYFRIEND! If I have to gain Marluxia's approval then I shall do it WITHOUT being SHISH-KABOBED! Understand? Now, I really honestly don't care what you think of me, but listen up! I love Riku to a point where I will quite willingly sacrifice my pride and dignity to his ex-boyfriends. But you sir take the cake! If you want me to even try and impress you, then do it yourself! Don't stand there and laugh at me whilst your girlfriend tries to turn me into a pin-cushion!'_

_Riku's eyes had widened as Larxene and Marluxia stared blankly at the heavily panting brunet. Then, slowly Marluxia smiled and tilted his head to the side, humming slightly. Was that approval? Did Marluxia believe that through Sora's ability to stand up for himself, he was worthy of being Riku's boyfriend? Really? Acceptance from the pretty, pretty girly-guy? Riku was just as lost as Sora. Larxene on the other hand, scooped up a spork from the barbecue and lobbed it at Sora's head. She did it so fast that no one really noticed that she had been armed until Sora cried out in absolute agony!  
_

_'ARGHHHhhhhh! What did I just SAAAAAAAY?'_

_Larxene blinked and cocked her head to the side, slightly frowning._

_'Eh? He's like a cockroach...he just won't DIE!'_

_'...'_

_'...'  
_

_All in all, Sora reckoned he made a good impression. He had gained Marluxia's (and Larxene's) approval - and it only took three knives and a spork to the face to gain it._

* * *

"So go on...enlighten me, who is the last person I must face."

"Do you have to be so dramatic?"

"Riku, you want me to meet the standards of FIVE EX-BOYFRIENDS! I am within my god-given right to be dramatic!"

"You know, when you put it like that, it actually sounds kinda bad."

"It is bad!"

"But is it worth it?"

"...huh?"

"Am I worth surviving through five ex-boyfriends plus family members?"

"Well yeah, of course you are!"

"Then stop whinging! Ahem, ex-boyfriend number five is..."

* * *

_Sora blinked._

_The guy stood before him carried on smiling. Sora turned to Riku. He blinked once more. Sora recited his mantra once again 'Riku is worth it, Riku is worth it', then with one more glance at the man before him, he came to the firm conclusion that Riku was not worth it and that he so totally owed him one. When Riku first told him, he had dearly hoped that Riku was just kidding._

_Obviously not.  
_

_Their teacher; their Art teacher? Seriously?_

_Mr Xehanort?_

_...that was messed up._

_

* * *

_

**Meh...don't question the last one. Xehanort/Riku was a phase I had gone through.**

**It was an epic phase. Anyway, due to the fact that I now have a TEN WEEK summer holiday, hopefully I will update more often. Hopefully.**

**Also, Leon and Cloud are GODS. Fact.  
**

**Perty please review!**

**Love City Girl**

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**


	3. DRAMA: Dramatic Irony

**I've written angst. This was supposed to be humour...ARGHHH! **

**Oh well...I tried to add in some dark humour, but whatever. Thank you for the reviews and the favourites and the alerts. They make me happy.**

**Even though I've written angst.**

**Drabble contains: **Angst. Unrequited love. Angst. Yaoi. Het. Angst. Sora's naïvety. Angst. Riku. Angst.

**Yes, happy, happy times.  
**

**ENJOY!  
**

**

* * *

**

DRAMA - Dramatic Irony

Definition: A situation that depends on the audience's knowing something that a character has not realized, or on one character's knowing something other characters do not know.

_Dramatic irony is the art of dramatically misunderstanding something that everyone else already knows about._

_

* * *

_

"You know, I think I might ask Kairi out tomorrow."

"...oh? As a birthday present? You sap."

"Of course! And I'm not a sap!"

"Hn. I thought you two were gonna wait, you know. Not rush into anything and all that."

"We were, but you see...she's the first and only girl who's ever wanted me. I'm not gonna miss that chance!"

"So you're worried about her moving on?"

"Totally. I mean, we were apart for a whole year Riku! Not to mention she forgot about me. What if she found some other guy to like?"

"...so? We were separated for a whole year and my memories of you were all fuzzy. I didn't replace you with some other guy I liked."

"You're different Riku."

"Of course I am."

"...you okay?"

* * *

_No. He wasn't okay. Of course, Sora was probably the last person he'd tell that to; if Riku ever mentioned his apparent love for Sora, he was certain that the brunet would only smile and laugh it off. After all, Riku was no sap, especially to his best friend. Why would Riku tell Sora that he loved him? Why would Sora love Riku back in 'that way'?_

_Truth was, he wouldn't. Ever since Kairi arrived, Riku saw all of his chances with Sora go up in smoke. Despite the fact that he had only been five at the time, Riku knew that he loved Sora. He would always love Sora...no one could love Sora like he did. No one would be able to understand it either as he wouldn't dare tell anyone or give anyone any clue to his unrequited love. Ah, unrequited love. Two words that could stab and twist and rip out a persons heart when they finally sunk in._

_Riku mentally smirked. As Charlie Brown once said__: 'Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love' - and Riku rather liked peanut butter too. So instead of moping about in Angst City, or whatever Sora called it, Riku tried to stifle it down. To hide it and make sure that no one saw how he felt towards his brunet. Although, no matter how hard he acted towards others, he knew that a few people had a small inkling. Leon especially, would always place a comforting hand on Riku's shoulder whenever Sora and Kairi shared a moment._

_The silver-haired boy didn't mind his actions much. It was the 'subtle' sympathetic glances he hated the most. It was why he never confirmed people's suspicions, it was why he tried so damn hard to hide his true feelings. Those glances would turn into words such as 'there are plenty more fish in the sea'. Well Riku didn't want fish...he wanted Sora._

_If only the brunet could see that though._

_Of course, he wouldn't and never will. Not while Kairi's around anyway and even if she went away (again), Sora will probably stop at nothing until he had her back (again). Kairi will always be top priority. The 'adventure' they had proves it- well, maybe that was due to his own fault with the whole 'opening the door to darkness' business, but still. It hurt knowing that he couldn't compare to beautiful and brave Kairi._

_Oh! And she was a Princess! The very cherry upon the cake that was 'why Riku will never get Sora'._

_Due to the fact that that cake was not a lie, Riku was reduced to having to accept the inevitable circumstance- tomorrow Sora would ask Kairi out, no doubt about it. It was hopeless to even contemplate Kairi rejecting Sora, when she so obviously liked him back. The reality of the situation was crystal clear - Sora wanted Kairi, Kairi wanted Sora, ergo, the prince and princess lived happily ever after and the frog was left behind. _

_Not that Riku was a frog. He was way too hot for that crap.  
_

_

* * *

_

"So, you're still asking Kairi out then?"

"Naturally."

"Because she wants you?"

"She's the only one who does..."

"C'mon, I bet plenty of people want you, don't be so hard on yourself."

"People want me to protect their worlds. People want me to fight the darkness. People want me to uphold all responsibility that's related to the Keyblade."

"Heh...'uphold the responsibility'? Never knew you listened in English."

"Riku! What I'm trying to say is that people never want me for me! They want me to do stuff for them, they want me to do all this stuff, but never do people just plain WANT me!"

"Sora, you're being ridiculous."

"I am not, and if I am then it's because of you and your contagious angst! Now I'm being all angsty and it's all because no one wants me except Kairi!"

"I want you!"

"..."

"..."

"...want me to do what?"

* * *

_Ah...fuck. _

_Break down...mentally break down. Don't let him see what you actually think. Break. Down. Mentally. How utterly clueless can one boy get? Although, Riku guessed it was sorta his fault there- damn. He never should have exploded like that. He was cool-and-collected-Riku, never does he speak before thinking it through first. That was Sora's job. _

_Then again, he couldn't help it. Sora was being all self-pitying, which was Riku's job. The silver-haired boy had always known that all the pressure of being the Keyblade Master would one day break Sora down. He never knew it would be this bad though. Other people would see Sora and they would see the brunet who adored being the Keyblade Master, who loved going to all those different worlds and meeting all these new people. They wouldn't, of course, see the fifteen year old boy who's spent the past two years fighting for his life and the lives of every other person in the universe (although one year was spent sleeping...but still)._

_Naturally, hearing Sora speaking such unbelievable things became the breaking point for Riku. Sora was wanted by many people, not just because he was the Keyblade Master. Riku just couldn't understand why Sora was so hellbent on Kairi liking and wanting him, when Riku was so obviously right in front of him. However, Sora never noticed him. Sora only noticed Kairi and if Sora wanted Kairi and would be truly and honestly happy with Kairi, then who was Riku to break them up?_

_Simple. He was no one. Riku had no right to get between the prince and his princess._

_The age-old __cliché_ _clearly applied here: if Sora was happy, then Riku was happy. Except he wasn't, and he never will be. Riku can act happy- he can be supportive and encourage Sora to ask Kairi out. He can help the brunet to tale to Kairi and flirt with her and buy her presents. Riku can smile and laugh and be as cool-and-collected as everyone expected him to be. Riku was Riku and he was a truly talented actor, through and through._

_On the inside however, his heart would slowly be filling up with darkness once more. Not as much to put everyone in great danger again, but enough to send Riku back to his corner of dark and depreciative thoughts. After his time in Radiant Garden and through many silent conversations with Cloud, Riku knew that his darkness could be stifled down as long as he found his 'light'. Sora had to be that light._

_Of course, Riku never told Sora that, because the brunet probably already knew...or he thought that Riku still had that 'crush' on Kairi, ergo, making Kairi his light. She wasn't though. When he first opened the door and when he kept Kairi in his possession, his heart never felt any brighter. Instead, he felt it weaken every time he glanced at her. Even back then, he knew that Kairi and Sora belonged to each other and he would be cast off as the third wheel._

_Or the frog. Whatever.  
_

_

* * *

_

"I...I ummm...I want...errr..."

"Forgot what you were gonna say? Ha! I do that all the time. Never knew it would happen to the 'cool and collected' Riku though!"

"..."

"Hey, you okay? You look kinda flushed?"

"Eh, what? Yeah, I'm fine. Just stop prodding me!"

"Sorry, you just look kinda...lost. Are you moping mentally again? C'mon Riku, this has to be, what, the fifteenth time this week!"

"It's only Monday."

"Exactly!"

"Hn. I'm fine Sora...nothing to worry about."

"Riku...are you sure?"

"Yep. So...how you gonna ask Kairi out tomorrow?"

"..."

"Stop looking at me like that! I promise I haven't gone into Angst World, or whatever it is you call it."

"It's Angst Mode and you totally look like you've take a one-way trip to it!"

"Unless you want me to hair-flip on your sorry ass, forget it!"

"Okay! Okay! Now...Kairi. Well, I was thinking maybe I could give her cake, but like, in shape of a Papou Fruit. That way I'm not really asking her to share her destiny with me, I'm only just implying it. Or perhaps one of those necklaces where you each have one and when you put them together they make a heart or something. Or maybe I could buy her a pet...or something. Oh! I could totally get the Moogles to synthesize something..."

* * *

_The smile on his face hurt. The smile on Sora's face made all the pain worth it._

_Sora was truly and honestly happy. Riku could tell by just gazing at him, listening to his excited words of how he was going to ask Kairi out. Although, the silver-haired boy could still feel that dagger through his heart, twisting and stabbing, his smile never wavered. If it did, Sora would notice and Sora would question and eventually Riku would break._

_Just like he had earlier. Thankfully, Sora's naïvety had helped him out of what could have been a very sticky situation. That incident would be locked away in his memories, kept there to remind him of how dangerous it was to break under pressure. Riku couldn't allow another incident like that occur, because Sora will find out. The brunet couldn't stay innocent forever and hopefully when that innocence was gone, Riku would have been able to get over him._

_How bittersweet that thought was. Riku knew he would never get over Sora, yet it was nice to dream._

_Riku mentally sighed. Sora carried on babbling away and the silver-haired boy continued to half-listen to his words. Kairi's birthday was tomorrow and Riku knew he would be witness to the happy moment that was Sora and Kairi becoming a couple. Riku would smirk and raise his eyebrows, like always. Riku would say 'about time' and be all cool-and-collected, like always. Riku would roll his eyes whenever Sora fumbled with his words, like always. Riku would smile and laugh at the pair of them, like always._

_And..._

_Riku would feel that knife, that darkness carve away at his weak heart, like always. Riku would feel that sting in his eye, like always. He would hold back the tears and laugh them off, like always. Riku would grit his teeth and bear the pain in his chest, like always. Riku would always feel the icy bite of the knife in his heart. Riku would always be taunted by the darkness, be teased for what he couldn't have. Riku would always pretend and act like nothing was wrong._

_Like. Always._

_The silver-haired boy gazed over at his clueless, yet utterly beautiful friend and sighed. Riku would feel the pain whenever Sora and Kairi kissed. Riku would feel the hurt whenever they went out and left him behind. Riku would feel lonely when he knew they were together and he was by himself._

_The prince and the princess would get their happy ending- and he would be left behind in the dust. Like always.  
_

_Whatever. At least he'd make one hell of a gorgeous frog._

_

* * *

_

**Riku. Makes. Anything. Work. Even frogs.**

**^_^ Gah! I adore writing the dialogue, but the descriptions make me wanna commit! So effing badly!**

**Anyway! Perty please review! ^_^**

**Next one shall be fluff...promise. I'll send them off to Christmas Town...or something. ^_^**

**Love City Girl**

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x  
**


	4. ENGLISH: Versilimitude

**Love to my reviewers! ^_^**

**Okaaay, so I've decided to go back to my fluffy roots and Ta-Dahhh! Sora and Riku go visit Santa. ^_^ Simples.**

**I should feel excited, because I'm going on holiday next week and I'm gonna see Toy Story 3 tomorrow, but I feel somewhat lethargic. Meh.**

**ANYWAY! The word for this story came from me scouring the internet looking for a word that could fit the story line. And I found this word. I couldn't pronounce it but I loved it muchly so. It. Fits. Perfectly! ^_^**

**Drabble Contains: **Beware the OOC...fluff...snow...possessed rag-doll-things...Riku's language...Sora? Yeah, let's give Sora his own warning! ^_^**  
**

**I went on KH2 again to get the layout for Christmas Town and I saw so much stuff that I hadn't noticed before! Then I got addicted again and began playing like nothing else mattered. I am now Level 90 and I'm going to face Mr. Fifteen Life Bars. Or Sephiroth as you all call him. ^_^**

**ENJOY!  
**

**

* * *

**

ENGLISH - Verisimilitude

Definition: The appearance of truth; the quality of seeming to be true. Pronounced 'ver-uh-suh-MIL-uh-tood'.

_I don't need an attitude, rebellion is a platitude. I only hope the verse is good, I hate verisimilitude._

_

* * *

_

"RIKU!"

"Geeze, Sora! Give a guy some warning before you sneak up on him!"

"But that defeats the purpose of sneaking up on someone."

"Just don't do it again!"

"Sorry, but I have some awesome news to tell you!"

"Does it involve a delicious, gourmet meal?"

"No."

"Does it involve -god forbid- your cooking?"

"No!"

"Does it involve anything edible at all?"

"Quit thinking with your stomach! I know I'm an hour late and all, but normal people don't starve to death that quickly!"

"How do you know? Have you met all these 'normal people'? And how dare you consider me 'normal', I'm rather special, if I do say so myself."

"Stop being stuck up."

"Whatever. So, what were you gonna say? And make it quick, I'm starving!"

"Well, you know how Christmas is another week away..."

"Point?"

"And you know how Kairi has gone to Twilight Town to visit Olette and them? And how everyone else is sorta busy, leaving us two on our own? Well, I pulled some totally hard to pull strings and -insert dramatic pause here- I booked the Gummi Ship, just you and me for the next three days!"

"What for?"

"Geeze, don't get too excited."

"Heh, sorry. For what reason?"

"That wasn't much better, but whatever. I have an awesome reason, so prepare yourself."

"Oh, I'm thoroughly prepared, don't you worry."

"Che, whatever. I, Sora the Keyblade Master and the very definition of awesome, am gonna prove to you once and for all that Santa does in fact EXIST!"

"Very nice Sora. Very...flamboyant of you to insist upon your theory, but how are you going to prove it?"

"Easy. I'm going to take you to him!"

"Oh? And how -pray tell- do we get to 'Santa'?"

"Through Halloween Town, duh!"

"..."

"..."

"You know, there's this voice in my head that's urging me to believe you, but it's diminished somewhat- and that's purely based on Santa's debatable real estate choices."

"Riku?"

"Yeah?"

"Shut up."

* * *

_It had taken four hours to get ready in total. Mainly because Sora was under contract declaring that he had to tell at least five reliable adults before taking off in the Gummi Ship. The story behind this contract is a very long story, but it's one that Sora is secretly proud to dictate, despite all the trouble he had caused. The brunet sighed wistfully as he recalled the story filled with drama, tears, broken down Gummi Ships, Sora, a time span of six months, a holiday to each world (bar the one that actually had five reliable adults on it) and the inevitable forgetfulness of actually telling someone where he was going._

_Naturally after a few months of hysterical calling, angry adults and even angrier friends, Sora found himself landing on Radiant Garden. Not that he had wanted to, but somehow Cid had managed to hack into the ship and into it's control system. What happened next ended in twelve months of being grounded, his Gummi Ship confiscated and Sora being coerced into signing a contract._

_To be fair though, it really wasn't his fault that he had lost his phone - and he had written a note for his mum__, so really, he couldn't understand what the fuss was all about._

_(Perhaps it had something to do with not actually giving the note to the aforementioned person? Whatever, it wasn't his fault that he had forgotten.)_

_After making the required phone calls to the five reliable adults, Sora then dutifully explained (as per contract) to his mother, where exactly he was going to go and for how long. After making numerous promises not to take any detours or go off to fight more darkness (he had to cross his fingers at that one), Sora bounded out of the door with suitcase in tow._

_The brunet couldn't help it, but he was excited. He and Riku hadn't gone off on their own in ages! The only reason he had gone on that trip by himself was due to Riku rejecting his idea (entering Angst Mode: Level 4 whilst doing so) and because Kairi had 'other stuff' to do. But not this time! Yeah, Kairi still had 'other stuff' to do, but at least this time Riku finally agreed to going with him. Punching the air with delight, Sora twirled around in his Gummi-Ship-Commander chair and waited for Riku patiently._

_Or as patient as he could wait for a guy who took longer in the bathroom than Kairi and his mum put together._

_Sora gazed at the ceiling and sighed as he continued to twirl. There were fourteen scratches on the ceiling and seven spots where the paint was peeling off. Cid won't be happy. Sora sighed again and checked his watch. Then he sighed again. And twirled. Sighed. Twirled. Checked his watch. Sighed. Twirled. Checked his wat_—

_'What are you doing?'_

_Wow. Riku actually spent less than two hours to pack. RECORD! Punching the air again, Sora grinned and motioned Riku to take a seat. The brunet was pumped and he couldn't wait to see the look on Riku's face when he was graced with the presence of Santa Clause! Riku merely smirked at Sora's behaviour and reminded himself once more as to why he indulged Sora with moments like these.  
_

_Pushing the large 'ON' button and getting the go ahead from Chip and Dale, Sora set the navigational system to Halloween Town. As they took off, Sora couldn't help but cry out a 'yeah'. For the next three days it would be him, Riku and the inevitable situation of watching Riku eat his non-believing words._

_Awesome.  
_

* * *

"Riku..."

"I know Sora."

"But, Riku...you look like—"

"I know Sora!"

"You look like a—"

"Don't say it Sora!"

"We're in public and you're looking like—"

"I'm warning you. Don't say anything!"

"...a girl."

"And he goes ahead and says it."

* * *

_When they first landed, Sora's clothes immediately changed into the respective attire of Halloween Town. Of course, his clothes were enchanted, so he had expected it. He hadn't expected Riku's clothes to change as well, nor had he expected Riku to take his change so casually...if it had been the brunet's costume, he would have stubbornly refused to leave the ship until they changed into something else. Instead, Riku posed in front of the Gummi Ship's mirror, turning this way and that and smirking as he did so._

_Poser. Not that Sora could blame him. Riku did look sorta good.  
_

_The first thing to capture Sora's eye was the pair of slinky satin pants, coloured in a pale blue. They were ripped though, torn at the knees and along the thighs, some tears tinged with red, despite the fact that the skin underneath was flawless. They were riding low on Riku's hips and Sora knew that the rusted silver-plated leaf belt quite honestly had no purpose, other than decoration. __His silky, blue v-neck was also ripped and slashed, cutting off just above Riku's beautifully defined stomach, yet falling quite nicely down his back. The sleeves were just as ripped and frayed as the rest of the outfit. As Riku finished inspecting himself, he tucked a lock of hair behind his ear and that's when Sora's eyes widened. Riku's ears had grown pointed and sharp.  
_

_Sora's eyes widened even further when Riku turned to walk out of the ship. The silver-haired boy also had a pair of wings on his back. Riku's wings, however, were made out of four large silver leaves, with the veins outlined in dark blue. They looked worn and frayed, like leaves when they were dying. That's when it hit Sora, Riku was an elf...a dead elf._

_A very girly, dead elf._

_The brunet couldn't help but giggle a little over how well Riku had taken his appearance (despite his apparent dislike over Sora actually voicing it out loud). Also, the silver-haired boy looked very comfortable in his new attire, that Sora couldn't help but poke a little fun at him._

_'You know, I love your shoes. Those extra five inches on the heels really make a difference to your legs. And your leaf-belt really does accent your trim figure. Oh, and the dark eye make-up? It really makes your eyes POP!'_

_Riku's eye twitched. He knew he should just ignore the boy. He knew that if he had any sort of decency, he should give the boy the cold shoulder and ignore him. However, it must be said that the boy was Sora and therefore no one could really ignore him._

_It was like, the law, or something._

_'Sora, if you say one more word then I'll turn around and take off in the Gummi Ship by myself.'_

_The brunet rolled his eyes and sighed. Riku could be such a fun-sucker sometimes. Swinging his arms and skipping towards the Hinterlands, Sora waved and smiled at Zero who had come out upon hearing Riku's voice. The little ghost dog floated over to the brunet, sending a small gust of air towards Sora, ruffling his hair gently. Sora took it as Zero's way of a welcome and smiled sweetly back at the ghost dog._

_Riku blinked and tilted his head to the side, not really as freaked out as he had expected himself to be when faced with the ghost of a dead dog. The ghost dog sniffed at Sora once more, before flying over to the silver-haired boy. Zero paused before the older boy, copying him by tilted his own head to the side. The dog then barked softly and flew around Riku's head as if he were trying to determine something. Sora laughed at the sight and stretched his arms behind his head._

_Riku shook his hair, the sensation of the dog flying around him sent unpleasant shivers up his spine. Zero barked once more and came to a stop before him. Then he gazed at Riku's chest expectantly. Riku blinked. Sora coughed nervously. Zero continued to stare, almost in confusion._

_'Um, Sora?'_

_The brunet licked his lips nervously._

_'Yeah Riku?'_

_'What's he doing?' Riku sounded more than a little nervous and Sora couldn't blame him._

_'Well, I think he's looking for something that should be there, that isn't and I guess he's just confused.'_

_Riku narrowed his eyes at the little dog, understanding immediately as to what Zero was looking for. Huffing and executing a perfect hair flip, Riku strode on, giving the ghost dog a very effective cold shoulder. Even Sora felt the frost from that one. Giving the ghost dog an apologetic smile, Sora hurried after the upset silver-haired boy. The older boy was nursing his bruised ego, with his arms crossed firmly against his chest._

_Sora just grinned.  
_

* * *

"You know you can't blame him. You don't look exactly male...or scary for that matter."

"...how is what you're wearing supposed to be scary?"

"Well, I'm supposed to be a vampire-type-thingy and you're well...you're an elf."

"Point?"

"Oh, no point. It's just that when people think elf, they think of Christmas and Santa and unscary thoughts like that."

"Whatever, at least I don't look cute."

"...you think I look cute?"

"Cool! I said 'cool'!"

"Uh huh, that was an awful save. Especially considering that, what you said before would have made no sense whatsoever, if you actually had said 'cool'."

"Whatever."

"It's okay if you think I look cute. Actually, I reckon that you look...ummm, well...sorta, kinda, maybe, rather, a bit...pretty."

"..."

"...are you blushing? And like, not hair flipping on me?"

"Shut up Sora!"

"Hmmmm...interesting..."

"What?"

"You know, you were right before. About how you were special. I think you are special...to me anyway."

"Was that a completely spontaneous and utterly random confession?"

"Will you blush again if I say 'yes'?"

* * *

_Did he really need an answer?_

_As a light flush coated Riku's cheeks, Sora giggled and decided to take pity on him. Flashing Riku a smile, he turned and carried on marching towards the heart of the Hinterlands. He was rather giddy and couldn't help but skip a little, humming happily under his breath. He was going to make Riku eat his words. Every single last one of them. Santa was real and Riku would know about it! Oh, Riku would definitely ask if he was on the 'Nice List' no doubt about that. Of course, he won't be...Sora mentally laughed, imagining the look on Riku's face when_—

_Sora paused. Something didn't feel right._

_Glancing behind briefly, he spotted a faint frown on Riku's face. As he came to a slow stop just before the clearing in the Hinterlands, Sora span on his heel and tilted his head. Surely what he had said hadn't affected Riku that much? Had it? Sora shook his head. Riku wouldn't let such words do that...right?_

_The brunet chewed his lip and flung out an arm as Riku approached him. The silver-haired boy glanced at him, schooling his expression into his 'cool and collected' default. But Sora had already noticed the gleam in Riku's eyes before he had shut down. Silly Riku...he should know better than to try and hide things from Sora. Licking his lips nervously, Sora cleared his throat and glanced up.  
_

_'I wasn't kidding around, you know? What I said before. You are special.'_

_Riku's eyes widened momentarily, before he snorted softly and ruffled Sora's hair affectionately. The brunet grinned up at him and Riku couldn't help but lean down to place a peck on Sora's cheek. Gasping as Riku pulled away, Sora clapped a hand to his cheek, and stared up with large eyes at the silver-haired boy._

_'Damn right I'm special- but so are you,' Riku responded, letting the blush coat the rest of Sora's face before carrying on. 'Of course, you're not as special as me, but whatever.'_

_'Ri-Ku!' Sora scowled, pushing at the silver-haired boy, before latching a firm grip on Riku's wrist and pulling him into the clearing. Riku smiled softly at Sora's actions and yanked his arm back sharply. Sora gasped and stumbled straight into Riku's chest. His cold, firm chest._

_Riku sucked in a quick breath of air as a pair of warm hands covered his chest. The silver-haired boy glanced down and noted the adorable flush that dusted Sora's cheeks._

_'Hello,' he whispered, entirely amused by the situation. Sora scowled._

_'Shut up. You're all cold, so I'm warming you up!' he retorted, still rubbing his hands over Riku's chest and bare stomach. Riku merely smiled and nuzzled his face into Sora's darkened chocolate locks. He hummed briefly as the scent of Sora flooded his mind._

_Eau de Sora was a very sweet combination of the fresh breeze, a gentle ocean and something else that was pure Sora. The brunet felt his eyes flutter close as Riku pulled him in close. They stood there, enjoying their stolen moment, for a few minutes. Riku had to pull away before he fell asleep standing up and he glanced down with bleary eyes at his sweet brunet._

_Sora smiled and nuzzled his chest, his cold nose a sharp contrast to Riku's now warm chest. Riku hummed slightly and Sora pulled away, flashing a grin at Riku. Allowing himself to be dragged along again, before halting to sudden stop. _

_Glancing down at the brunet's now impish expression, Riku looked around with confusion.  
_

* * *

"Sora? Are we going or not?"

"But we're here."

"...Sora, this is a tree."

"But look what's on the tree."

"Okay, so I see a tree that's got a tree painted on it. I could have seen that at home."

"Riku! Just wait a minute..."

"Uh huh. Is this supposed to make me believe in Santa or something, cause I still don't."

"You know, I hope those words tasted sweet, because I'm gonna make you eat them in a bit!"

"Yeah, sure. Whatever you say Sora."

"Humph! Right...and...voilà!"

"...what the hell?"

"Heh, wanna go in first, or shall I?"

* * *

_It was Riku who decided to go in first. It was also Riku who regretted going in first as he fell down, surrounded by a whirlpool of colour, before landing in something really, really, really cold. And wet, and white, but mostly cold. Not good. Especially considering how revealing his outfit was and how unfit it was in keeping him warm. Riku stumbled to his feet, brushing the snow off his shuddering arms and hugged himself tightly._

_It was freezing. Surely he was going to die of hypothermia soon, which would be a shame. Flipping back his hair at the snow, Riku turned to see Sora gracefully landing to his feet after falling down a tree. Riku blinked and cocked his head to the side. The brunet grinned and answered his silent question._

_'Months of practise.'_

_Riku nodded, understanding apparent in his eyes.  
_

_Shaking the snow off of him, Sora swung out an arm and latched it around Riku's wrist. Before the silver-haired boy could blink, he found himself being dragged towards a little...cozy...village?_

_'Holy...fuck.'_

_Riku's eyes widened behind his floppy fringe and his mouth parted in shock. Sora giggled at his reaction and began to yank him down Yuletide Hill. As Riku neared the little village, his eyes began to flicker around, taking in all the sights and sounds before him. Two large candy cane poles acted as the entrance to Candy Cane Lane and Riku had to bite his tongue to hold back a snarky remark on how unoriginal the names were._

_Instead, he concentrated on keeping warm and taking in as much as he could of the winter wonderland. Surrounding the village were two snow-covered hills, with a train running through them. He quirked an eyebrow as he saw that the carriages resembled gingerbread houses. Speaking of houses, Riku eyed the houses in the actual village. They were big, yet the doors and windows were tiny and they all seemed to be made out of gingerbread. He gasped as he watched a little person leave one of the houses and he suddenly felt the urge to whip out Way To Dawn. The little person (Sora might refer to her as an elf) looked like a rag doll. One of Kairi's to be specific and Riku certainly had no qualms over slaying possessed rag dolls._

_Only Sora wouldn't be happy, because to Sora they were elves. Not possessed rag dolls out to eat everyone._

_If Riku wasn't so convinced that she was a possessed rag doll, then he might have thought her to be rather cute. She had little red dress on and an adorable over-sized pink hat on her head with a cutesy little heart-bobble on the end of it and- what the hell? Riku shook his head free of such 'cutesy' thoughts and hoped that he and Sora would leave soon. This town was getting to him and so far, all he had seen was a few houses and a possessed-rag-doll-elf-thing._

_Unfortunately for him, Sora was oblivious to his mental suffering and started to express his delight at all the 'totally awesome' things they could do._

_'Oh, and if you wanna go ice-skating, then there's this lake near the Christmas Tree Plaza. It's not very big, but it has this killer awesome tree in the middle of it! Oh! And we can totally have a snowball fight in the Christmas Tree Plaza. It's like this huge empty space of snow and I didn't get the chance to have one last time. Ooooh! We could help Santa wrap up the presents...OH! Even better, we could MAKE the presents and-'_

_And that's when Riku stopped listening. He rolled his eyes and resisted the urge to ruffle Sora's hair as the brunet continued to explain how awesome it would be to help Santa this year at Christmas. Whatever. The brunet was happy and that's all Riku cared about for now...anyway, he had spied something much more better than wrapping up presents. It was stood in the center of Candy Cane Lane and Riku had this sudden childish urge to race towards it._

_A merry-go-round. He hadn't been on one in forever. Riku licked his lips nervously and cocked his head to the side. Would it be weird if 'cool and collected' Riku were to ask to go on a children's ride? He hummed...it would, wouldn't it. Still, the silver-haired boy had paused in his steps and gazed at the ride with a small longing glint in his eye. Sora had stopped talking when he realised that Riku wasn't listening, but instead of getting annoyed, he felt utterly amused by Riku's staring at the merry-go-round._

_It was a pity it was still broken. They never really had gotten around to fixing it yet. Sora knew Riku would have loved going on it. The brunet also knew that Riku would have picked the penguin. Riku adored penguins. Speaking of the silver-haired boy, he had finished gazing at the merry-go-round and was once more taking in the sights. Snow. Possessed-Rag-Doll-Elves. Mini-Houses. Trains. Merry-Go-Round. A Penguin On Merry-Go-Round._

_It was way too surreal and to be fair, only two words came to mind when it all settled in.  
_

* * *

"Holy fuck!"

"Riku! Don't swear in Christmas Town! Santa might hear you!"

"Huh...not very imaginative with their names, are they?"

"Never mind the town's name! More importantly, do you believe me yet?"

"Well, considering the fact that all I've seen so far is snow, houses and little people—"

"They're called elves!"

"—I would say...no."

"...what!"

"Dude, I've seen all this last year at the mall, remember?"

"Oh yeah, when you destroyed many children's faith in Santa by pulling that guy's beard off."

"That was an accident!"

"Uh huh, sure it was. And I'm sure that getting his pretty elf assistant's phone number was an accident too."

"...totally."

* * *

_It was a total accident, thank you very much. After successfully making twenty-three children cry, Riku had smoothly decided that it was within his best interests to escape and to escape quickly. Unfortunately, that escape had been delayed as a very pretty elf took the initiative to stand in his way. She had long brown hair, curled in ringlets and she had a cutesy sort of face with big brown eyes. Riku had given her the once over and wrinkled his nose, deciding that it would be best to walk around her and leave._

_Sadly, he wasn't quick enough and the pretty elf girl had shoved a piece of paper into his hand with a wink, before skipping off. Of course, this was all from Riku's perspective who then dutifully told Sora that he had binned the number as soon as he had gotten home. The brunet had found the number a month later pinned to Riku's notice board._

_Sora didn't speak to Riku for a whole week._

_I digress, the point was that Riku actually had the nerve to compare this beautiful, snowy haven with the craptacular version that Destiny Islands Mall had tried to recreate. Nothing could come close with how real Christmas Town was and in Sora's eyes, it was 100% legit. Unfortunately, his eyes were not Riku's eyes, therefore it seemed impossible for Riku to actually believe in this perfectly reliable and very much real environment like Sora._

_Unless of course Riku was in denial.  
_

_Sora yanked Riku along towards the biggest and coziest house in Candy Cane Lane. Riku rose an eyebrow as he spied a sleigh, safely locked behind candy cane gates and briefly wondered if it was all that safe. Anyone could just come along and nibble away at the confectionery, therein the sleigh wouldn't be all that protected and then anyone could just steal it. Not that Riku was thinking of doing so._

_Nope. No way._

_As they approached the door, Riku wrinkled his nose. The house smelled of ginger and cinnamon, and his stomach growled as he realised that the door was made of gingerbread. He reached forward with a single finger and stroked it along the door. A couple of crumbs fell off onto his fingertip and he then proceeded to lick them off. He closed his eyes as the spicy, yet sweet taste of gingerbread filled his mouth and he hummed his approval._

_The silver-haired boy was overcome with the sudden urge to nibble away at the door, but restrained himself. Sora would not be happy if he ate the door that belonged to 'Santa'. Seeming as though he could read Riku's thoughts (or rather the hunger in his eyes), Sora smacked Riku's arm and scowled at him. The silver-haired boy huffed and rubbed his arm roughly. Sora's scowl instantly melted when he turned back towards the temptingly delicious, gingerbread door. Knocking once, twice, thrice, a distant 'come in' could be heard and Sora grinned with delight._

_Riku was once more manhandled and dragged into the house as Sora opened the door. His senses were instantly attacked with the scent of nutmeg and cocoa. Wrinkling his nose, Riku blinked owlishly at the interior design. The place screamed comfort and Riku had to resist (he was doing that a lot today) making himself at home straight away. Entering the main room, the silver-haired boy froze in his tracks._

_The fire place crackled away and the muffled sound of machinery could be heard nearby. Sora bounded into the room, rubbing his hands in front of the fireplace, chattering away to the only other occupant in the room. Riku remained frozen, his eyes large and blinking as he just stared. The brunet noted Riku's strange silence and turned to face him, tilting his head to the side cutely. A knowing grin stretched his lips and he cleared his throat._

_'Riku, Santa. Santa, Riku.'  
_

* * *

"Holy fuck!"

"Riku! Don't swear in front of Santa!"

"Well...shit. You-you're all...real. Damn."

"Riku!"

"It's alright Sora. I'm sure Riku is just in shock over how real I am, in fact."

"So? That doesn't excuse his swearing! Plus, he hasn't even apologized yet!"

"It doesn't matter Sora, I don't need an apology from him. The fact that he believes in me now is more than enough compared to a simple apology."

"W-Wait, does this mean I'm on the 'Nice List' now, you know, due to the fact that I believe in you and all."

"Oh no. You have to earn that right back. There are many children that believe and yet, are still naughty. Even Sora had to earn his right on the 'Nice List' once more."

"Oh? And how would one go about making it back onto the list?"

"I suppose you could assist my elves on making the finishing touches and whatnot. That would be a good start."

"Pfft...as long as he doesn't go home with any phone numbers then—"

"What was that Sora?"

"Nothing, nothing at all!"

* * *

**Bleurghh. Okay. I'm back to fluff. Yay.**

**Still, I feel unsatisfied with this chapter. I may come back to revise it later.**

**I love making up outfits for the characters, especially after I started writing '**We're All Mad Here**', but I just don't like writing about it. I find myself writing LONG paragraphs over the smallest details because I really want people to see how I see it and it's just so...annoying. Meh.  
**

**Anyway, I'm thinking...maybe take them to another world? Have them sing in Atlantica or go prowling the Pride Lands or something.**

**Hoohaaa...perty please review!**

**Love City Girl**

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

**P.S. I would buy out the entire stock of Eau de Sora! ^_^**


	5. BIOLOGY: Adaptation

**I was on holiday. For ten days. Lost my muse. Became obsessed with The Darren Shan Saga. Decided to write a fanfiction for said saga...then remembered this.**

**It was half finished before my holiday, so I decided to complete it now, before I did my DSS fanfiction.**

**THANK YOU FOR MY REVIEWS YOU LOVERLY PEOPLES! ^_^  
**

**I love this one with all my heart, yet I could probably revise it some more! ^_^ I actually spent ages trying to figure out whether I should go to Atlantica or The Pride Lands. Then I came across a very interesting fact regarding lions. So...voila!**

**ENJOY!**

**

* * *

**

BIOLOGY - Adaptation

Definition: An alteration or adjustment in structure or habits, often hereditary, by which a species or individual improves its condition in relationship to its environment.

_Whatever there be of progress in life comes not through adaptation but through daring, through obeying the blind urge._

_

* * *

_

"You know, when I came here the first time round, Donald said that Kairi would've thought me as 'cute'."

"If you ask me, I reckon you look like something a cat hacked up."

"Well, guess it's a good job that I didn't ask your opinion then!"

"Hmmm...I look pretty good though. And, I have a much cooler mane than your fuzzy little cotton ball."

"You wish you could have my 'fuzzy cotton ball'!"

"Whatever makes you happy Sora."

"Grrr...I am happy! Now, will you please hurry up and finish admiring yourself?"

"Sora, perfection such as myself should be savoured and admired slowly. Each and every detail should be taken in, from the way my eyes gleam to my beautiful, soft, shiny fur and...are you listening?"

"Sorry. I sorta zoned out after 'perfection such as myself'."

"..."

"...!"

"...?"

"D-Did you just 'mane-flip' on me?"

"Yes, and it was perfectly executed."

"Y-You mane-flipped on me?"

"I can do it again if you require another demonstration?"

"No..no I'm good. Please, admire yourself to your heart's content!"

* * *

_Sleek, slimline fur rippled as the muscles moved underneath. A glossy coat of soft silver glimmered in the sun and a pair of feline, aquamarine eyes regarded the reflection carefully. A long, straight mane of bright, quicksilver hair fell over slender shoulders. Crouching down, Riku blinked as his tail came into view. The white band that he usually wore around his left arm now rested at the end of his tail, with silver tufts of hair jetting out from it. His nose was jet black with fine whiskers protruding from either side of it. And the teeth. Oh...the sharp, dangerous, ivory teeth. Riku liked...very much.  
_

_Sora eyed him, waiting patiently for Riku to get over his new appearance. He rolled his eyes as Riku flexed his paws, the claws shooting out and glinting in the sunlight. Bored of observing his best friend preening himself, Sora switched his attentions to a little blue butterfly hovering nearby. Riku hummed his approval and retracted them. Stretching out and getting used to his new body, Riku glanced over to Sora. The brunet lion was lying on his back, his paws batting at a butterfly fluttering above him. Smiling at the sight, Riku cocked his head to the side and purred at the idea forming in his mind._

_Crouching low, Riku cursed his silver fur for being totally inconvenient, camouflage-wise. Then he blessed Sora's ability to become adorably oblivious at the best of times. The thin blades of grass tickled his stomach as he prowled closer, grateful that he could control his ticklish weakness better than Sora. Retracting his claws and careful not to make any sound, Riku approached the distracted young lion._

_Feline mouth curled up into a wicked grin; he was mere inches away from Sora. Lowing his upper body to the floor and slightly raising his hindquarters, Riku narrowed his eyes and waited. Sora continued to bat at the little butterfly, his giggle as the insect landed on his nose almost melted Riku's heart. Almost. The silver lion, growled deep in his throat._

_Then, pushing off powerful legs, Riku pounced._

_Startled, the butterfly flew away, her wings almost getting damaged in the fray as Sora had cried out in shock. Riku laughed and pinned Sora down, grinning wickedly at his trapped prey. Sora squirmed and whimpered, pouting at being caught unawares. The brunet growled as Riku used one of his paws to trap both of Sora's against his chest. Spitting and hissing Sora tried to bite at Riku's paw, getting swiped over the head in the process._

_'This isn't fair!' he complained, trying his best glare on Riku- and getting his efforts laughed at._

_'You're so adorable when you do that,' Riku purred, nuzzling Sora's neck affectionately. Sora's entire body began to vibrate, as a stream of purrs escaped his throat. Averting his blue eyes, filled with embarrassment, Sora sighed and his bottom lip jutted out. Riku felt a sudden urge of...something build up within him. He didn't know what the 'something' was, but he after feeling Sora's pleasure at being nuzzled, Riku knew he had to do more._

_'Oh Sora...you have no idea what you do to me,' he sighed, rubbing his nose against Sora's ear. The brunet scoffed and turned to face him with a glare._

_'Don't try to sweet talk me! I'll have you know that I've killed you THREE times in my head so far!'_

_'Awwww...only three times?' Riku purred._

_Sora grumbled and twisted his body around, trying to crawl out from underneath Riku. The silver lion quirked an eyebrow and a slow, impish grin grew on his feline lips. Relaxing his whole body, he slumped on top of Sora, mentally laughing as his friend squeaked from the sudden weight that fell upon him. Squirming and writhing underneath Riku, Sora hissed and swiped a paw at Riku's nose._

_'Get off! Now!' Sora commanded. Riku shook his head and made himself comfortable on top of Sora._

_'Nah, I rather like it up here,' he replied, snuggling closer to Sora's twisting body._

_'You wouldn't like it if I did it to you!' Sora hissed, amusing Riku even more._

_'You couldn't pounce on me if your life depended on it,' Riku said, annoying Sora with his purring voice and his smug smirk._

_'Oh yeah, well I'll prove it!' Sora declared, as he finally wriggled out from underneath Riku's body. The silver lion watched as the brunet shook his body out and playfully crouched down to the ground. 'I'll show you, you just watch!' he said and jumped off to hide in the bush. Riku rolled his eyes and decided it best to make himself comfortable._

_God knows how long he'll be left waiting here.  
_

_

* * *

_

"..."

"..."

"...!"

"Gotcha!"

"No Sora, you didn't."

"What are talking abo—oh. Hey Timon!"

"The guy pounces on me and almost dissects me and all he can say is 'HEY TIMON'?"

"You know him Sora?"

"Of course he knows me! I...I...you...are one big lion."

"Um, Timon...he's not gonna eat yo—"

"PUMBAA! Pumbaa...I'M SURROUNDED!"

"You know, I'm starting to see how you two would know each other."

"Shut up Riku! Timon, Riku wouldn't eat you, he's—"

"A LION!"

"Hah...enter Pumbaa, stage right."

* * *

_Riku eyed the newcomers with mixed feelings. He was amused and he could understand as to why they would all get on, but a darker part of him realised just how well Sora got on without him. It was that darker side of him that became jealous of Donald and Goofy. It was that darker side of him that almost obliterated his friendship with Sora. It was also the part of him that Sora was trying to burn out. The silver-haired boy shook his head, his mane reflecting the sunlight. He supposed it was these dark thoughts that made Sora's job all the more harder._

_Locking his bad thoughts away, Riku sat back on his haunches and regarded the scene with amusement. Sora was trying to calm the pair down, insisting that Riku would most definitely not eat him and that he was sorry for pouncing on Timon. As the meerkat and the warthog turned to stare at Riku, he decided to tease them. He eyed the hungrily and crouched down, licking his lips and growling at them._

_As they fainted, Sora shook his head and swiped at Riku's head with his tail. 'Stop tormenting them Riku!' he scolded the silver lion, nudging the two unconscious animals with a paw. Riku rolled his eyes and gazed around the Oasis they were at. It really was beautiful and he especially adored the large waterfall he could see from the edge of the cliff. Lying down and gazing at the view, he failed to notice the arrival of another newcomer._

_A beautiful lioness trotted into the Oasis, greeting Sora with a pounce and a lick. Riku lifted his head up at Sora's shriek and felt another jolt of jealousy hit his abdomen. The lioness was awfully pretty and here she was, literally all over Sora. Shaking his head, Riku stood up and made his way over to the very happy pair. Sora glanced up at him and beamed._

_'Riku, this is Nala! She's the lion queen I told you all about!' Sora said brightly. Ah, he had forgotten. Nala. Lion queen. Married. To someone who isn't Sora. Bye, bye jealous feelings._

_Shaking his head, Riku put on his most charming smile and bowed down to her slightly. Nala laughed and nudged him with her paw playfully. 'Now here's someone who could teach you some manners Sora!' she declared cheerfully.  
_

_Riku smirked at him and stuck his tongue out with a wink. Sora shook his head and then turned to see Pumbaa and Timon still unconscious on the floor. Rolling his eyes, Sora bent down and whispered, 'Oh my god! Is that a Goliath beetle?' His words had the desired effect and both Timon and Pumbaa jumped up, looking around wildly. Sora burst out laughing, with Riku and Nala shaking their heads at his antics._

_As Timon and Pumbaa searched for the much desired beetle, Nala led the two boys out of the Oasis. 'Simba would love to meet you Riku! Sora, you know he misses you as well,' she stated, conversationally. Riku and Sora trotted after her, eager to see Simba.  
_

_A pair of male lions were fighting fiercely before them as they left the Oasis. One of them was Simba, Sora could spot him from a mile off. The other lion however, he had never seen before. Whoever he was, he must have pissed Simba off something awful to have the lion king tackle him like that. Nala regarded the pair with amusement and sat back, indicating Riku and Sora to do the same._

_'There's Simba and the other one is Kovu. He is the mate of my daughter, Kiara,' she informed them. Sora nodded and carried on staring at the two wrestling lions with awe. Riku felt the urge to join in, the tension and the thrill of the fight before him sent a sizzling spike of adrenaline rushing up his spine._

_Both Sora's awe and Riku's urge melted away instantly when Kovu dropped to the ground and Simba mounted him. Yes. Mounted him, as in, Simba climbed on top of Kovu. Then they did...stuff. Stuff that, as far as Sora knew, should belong and stay in a bedroom. Stuff that only his parents did, or in the case of gender, stuff that Leon and Cloud did. Naughty, adult stuff that Sora's virginal eyes shouldn't be seeing. At all._

_Riku's eyes widened as the two large males began to hump, their growls reaching a crescendo, until Riku couldn't hear anything but their noises. This was the worst way to meet the king of lions! This wasn't right and it probably wasn't something that they should be seeing. Right? Right! Also, shouldn't Nala be furious right now? Nala's mate was humping the mate of her daughter and she wasn't doing anything?_

_Glancing up, they both noticed the lack of distress, anger or even annoyance on Nala's face. Actually she seemed sorta...happy?  
_

_ Riku shook his head and buried it in his paws. Sora meanwhile, couldn't keep his curiosity at bay and had to ask._

_He just had to ask.  
_

* * *

"W-What are they doing?"

"Huh? What do you mean? Don't the lions in your pride do the same thing?"

"Uh...well...ummm..."

"They go off somewhere sure, but they don't exactly say what they're doing, do they Sora?"

"Um, what are they doing?"

"Hmmm, guess I should explain it then. Although maybe I should let your mothers give you this talk."

"'This talk?' It-it isn't like 'The Talk'...is it?"

"Oh no! This is far less embarrassing! Hm. Okay, I'll tell you. You see, in every pride there are at least two male lions leading it. In order to maintain a strong, deep bond, the male lions will have sex. The stronger the bond, the stronger the pride. Of course, my daughter and I are completely fine with this. It's just natural, understand?"

"...woah."

"I thought you said this wasn't like 'The Talk'!"

"Woah, calm down Sora."

"Trust me Sora, it's fine. Besides, it's highly likely that you two will be doing the same in the future. Unless you go off in separate prides, that is."

"D-Doing the s-s-same? A-As in...s-s-s-sex?"

"Of course."

* * *

_Clearly Nala didn't understand that she had done more damage than good. Swallowing deeply, Sora side-glanced at Riku, feeling a hot flush hit him hard. Shivering slightly, he turned away quickly, not really wanting to make eye-contact with Riku just yet. If this was the kinda stuff they were going to teach in Biology next year, then you could count him out! Clearing his throat, he began to edge away from Riku and Nala quietly, not wanting to draw attention to himself, especially if that attention was from Riku._

_He inched away from the two lions, who were still watching the males go at it, and managed to get behind a rock. Just a few more backward steps and then he was free to sprint all the way back to the ship and hide there for the rest of his life!  
_

_Unfortunately for him, (it just wasn't his day) he stumbled over backwards and collapsed in a crumpled heap. Cracking open his eyes, he saw the culprit that had tripped him over. A pebble. Typical. His surprised growl must have alerted Riku and Nala of his disappearance and, as if someone up there really wanted to torment him (he's putting his bets on Axel), he then saw Riku's concerned gaze fill up his vision, and he flushed deeply. Standing straight up, he stiffly began to walk off, declaring at the top of his voice that it was nice seeing Nala again and that he and Riku really, really needed to go._

_Cocking her head to the side, and thankful that Simba and Kovu were too busy to hear them, Nala smiled. 'Come back soon okay!'_

_'SOON. YES. WE SHALL. RIKU. COME. NOW. NOTINTHATWAYOFCOURSE!' Sora replied, forcing nervous laughter out of his throat.  
_

_Following him after nodding goodbye to Nala, Riku eyed him warily. It annoyed Sora to no end that Riku appeared rather unruffled despite the biology lesson they had just received. 'Sora...are you okay?'_

_'OF COURSE. WHY SHOULDN'T I BE?' he asked, still marching stiffly and still shouting at the top of his voice. Riku rolled his eyes and sighed._

_'Oh I don't know. Might have something to do with the fact that you are destroying my eardrums, but whatever,' he replied, still calm, still not embarrassed. Unlike Sora. That fact in itself was so not fair. Sora sighed and slumped over a little, his movements still stiff with embarrassment._

_'Well, I'm fine now. Okay? Good? Yes, let's go!' he stated, walking a little faster in the direction of the Gummi Ship. Riku hummed in understanding and a little smile crossed his lips. He trotted over to Sora and nudged him with his nose._

_'You're embarrassed, aren't you? With seeing them two go at it and then Nala saying all that,' he said, amusement and teasing laced his tones. Sora shook his head and walked that tad bit faster._

_'D-Don't know what you're talking about! But whatever it is you are talking about, you should shut up about! It will never happen and I never want to see it happen either!' he snapped, walking so fast, he might as well have been sprinting. Riku paused in his steps and sat back down on his haunches. Cocking his head to the side, he adopted a mock-hurt expression and whined._

_'Sora...I don't know whether to be offended or not. So you really never want to have sex with me?' he asked innocently. His actions had the desired effect as Sora halted with a choke and span around with a look of frozen horror on his face._

_'S-Sex? With you? Ahahahaha! Why, Riku never knew you felt that way!' he teased, trying to hide his mortification. Riku sniffed and stood back up, walking past Sora breezily with an air of a very hurt person._

_'Suppose it doesn't matter either way. You obviously don't want to have sex with me so...' he trailed off, leaving Sora to fill in the blanks. Sora gasped and ran up to him, eyes wide with fear and hope._

_'So, you do feel that way? Ah, ummm...well, I guess sex with you wouldn't be that bad. But not right now and definitely not like a lion!' he proclaimed passionately. Riku snorted and shook his head, turning to lick Sora's nose affectionately. _

_'Oh Sora...you're too easy,' he stated and trotted off, leaving Sora to fume silently.  
_

* * *

"Maybe we should bring Leon and Cloud here sometime. They look as if they could use some deep, strong bonding."

"Riku! Don't say that!"

"Come on, you know it's true."

"I'm telling them you said that!"

"Sora, just think about it! We sorta are like a pride. Leon and Cloud are the leaders...or kings. Me and you are like princes! Aerith is obviously the queen and Kairi is the rather literal princess. Tifa and Yuffie are the hunting lionesses an—"

"You're really getting into this, aren't you?"

"Oh? And the idea of being a prince doesn't seem cool to you?"

"Ummm, well I gue—"

"Especially after what Donald and Goofy told me...Mister I-Just-Can't-Wait-To-Be-King!"

"Argh...they told you about that?"

"Oh Sora...they told me _everything_!"

"...define everything."

"Everything means _everything_, Sora."

* * *

**Okay, yahh. **

**It's true BTW. Male lions do have sex to strengthen bonds. Look up '**Animal Sexual Behaviour**' on Wikipedia. You will learn stuff that no school will EVER teach! ^_^**

**Oh and I made Riku a lion. I did not want to make him a lion. I wanted him to be a jackal, until I realised that the above statement was true and I thought: **_Self, screw it. Make the situation awkward for the boys and make Riku a lion_**. So I did. ^_^**

**Blah. I liked this one better than the last one muchly so. I guess it's because The Lion King is my favourite film EVER and no other film can beat it. ^_^**

**Also, when Riku says '**Mister I-Just-Can't-Wait-To-Be-King**', I didn't mean it as in Sora sang that song, but as in Sora wanted to be King. Yeah...**

**Perty please review!**

**Love City Girl**

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x  
**


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